The Gifts from my Muse

What have I learned?

It all started when a chat began with my muse.

1.(Muse) (in Greek and Roman mythology) each of nine goddesses, the daughters of Zeus and Mnemosyne, who preside over the arts and sciences. The muses are generally listed as Calliope (epic poetry), Clio (history), Euterpe (flute playing and lyric poetry), Terpsichore (choral dancing and song), Erato (lyre playing and lyric poetry), Melpomene (tragedy), Thalia (comedy and light verse), Polyhymnia (hymns, and later mime), and Urania (astronomy). I love that nine daughters of the gods would be considered the inspiration for all things arts and sciences. https://www.ancient.eu/muse/ .

2. a person or personified force who is the source of inspiration for a creative artist.

First, let me say I was not looking for a muse. I was moving along in my life as a mom to almost launched adults and as a small business owner when a computer virus connected me to my muse through Facebook Messenger. No kidding. Thank you to "Thug Life" for starting a conversation that changed my life! It was not intentional by either of us to connect at that time, but I believe it was meant to be. I think my muse came into my life to help me see that there were doors waiting to be opened and ideas needing to be explored. My muse almost magically appeared to lead me to new thoughts while I was begging for anything to break me out of the doldrums my life had settled in to. I became alive again, thanks to my muse. I can only hope I gave my muse something good in return.

"What you seek is seeking you." Rumi https://www.wellandgood.com/what-you-seek-is-seeking-you/.

My muse fulfilled an unsatisfied need for curiosity and growing and knowing. As an Encyclopaedist https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Encyclop%C3%A9distes and Ubermensch https://ccrma.stanford.edu/~pj97/Nietzsche.htm , my muse has wonderful gifts of intensity and urgency and a thirst to KNOW that has given me insight to a million new ideas in a very short time. My muse has spent a lifetime learning and listening and sharing and I will be forever grateful that so many ideas were shared with ME.

I am so, SO grateful for my muse who, through long, honest and challenging conversations, breathed into me NEW LIFE. My muse inspired me to grow my mind and my heart and to take risks and imagine the impossible and take real action to become who I am meant to be. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pe670Q9cJXE.

My muse inspired me, a constantly recovering codependent who is a champion at caring for others, to take care of ME first. I was reminded I can be a good person with a good heart and still tell people to F--- off. I was reminded that caring for myself is my first obligation and it's important to set BOUNDARIES.  https://www.everydayhealth.com/emotional-health/do-you-have-a-codependent-personality.aspx . I was asked challenging questions about what was in my heart and mind and what I liked and what I wanted out of life for myself. At first, I found it really hard to even verbalize who I am and what I want and what I stand for and awkward silence often followed. I am grateful for those questions because they really made me think about myself for the first time in a long time. They helped me realize that I matter in a way I had forgotten and that I had work to do on ME.

I am so grateful for the reminder that we are all just small players on this planet and that we all need to love each other and be on a path with love.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?reload=9&v=GO5FwsblpT8.

I am grateful for my polymath muse https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polymath who took the time to share what they know about so many things and who saw in me a willing learner with an open and eager mind. My muse inspired me to find my voice and my words and to read and write poetry https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/49303/howl and song lyrics and short stories and monologues. My muse prodded and encouraged me to use those words, thoughts and feelings, some long buried deep under the weight of years, and express them all. My muse shared music with me from true artists with passion and purpose and genius and we listened together to sounds that changed my heart and soul and awareness forever. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KqgHosrqJ8o .My muse inspired me to finally get a music service and find sounds that speak to my soul in ways that only music can. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lPXWt2ESxVY .

My muse inspired me to get a guitar and make learning to play it a new way to express my creativity (still, however, working on getting any real music out of that thing and my fingers). https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/2481962.Music_Theory_Made_Easy_New_Edition.

My muse encouraged and inspired me to READ more books by great writers and to be a creator of words and ideas in my own right. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Sport_and_a_Pastime, https://creativescreenwriting.com/how-to-save-the-cat/.

I was introduced to the expansive universe of podcasts and all the information available to us any time of the day or night https://www.npr.org/podcasts/510318/up-first. I was introduced to audiobooks on Audible and the gift of having stories read to me on my commute. https://www.audiobooks.com/audiobook/recovery-freedom-from-our-addictions/306329?refId=38712&gclid=CjwKCAjw0On8BRAgEiwAincsHCrVQRR0OLB3-JXdAtc_DvxK6Bo9ZSLnGwvTvdyJy1o7rKR99SsTkRoC5LcQAvD_BwE .

My muse stirred me to become more aware of all the knowledge and insight that brilliant others give us through their writing and sharing of words and ideas. https://www.brainpickings.org/ . My muse inspired me to look at visual presentations and movies by great producers and directors and see the stories they have told that reflect our reality and our fantasy. He shared the importance of listening to people who live their own truths and don't sell out for money or fame. I learned about old movies and film noir and the chemistry of the relationships of famous Golden Age couples like Myrna Loy and William Powell https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fWwicQWWU34 , Claudette Colbert and Clark Gable https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xhwLWJrdZBk and, of course, Katherine Hepburn and Spencer Tracy https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-hKrcWyO2bI.

My muse inspired me to exercise my body and dream new dreams of mountains to go up and come down from, reminding me that the summit is only the halfway point of any trek. We imagined together of a bike adventure across the south of France retracing the steps of Van Gogh in Arles and Provence and of a ski adventure in Japan, written about beautifully in this article: https://www.powder.com/stories/features/this-small-japanese-resort-distills-skiing-to-its-core/. Just the thinking about the possibilities brought the best possible feelings in the moment. I learned that creating daydreams together is a beautiful gift.

My muse inspired me to stop talking and listen. Listen to the silence and the stillness and the spaces in between. Just stop talking and be present in the quiet. This was an often repeated conversation that left an indelible imprint in my mind about the importance of negative space in everything. https://nosidebar.com/negative-space/.

I learned to want more experience and to want to live life outdoors and outside my comfort zone.  I learned about the exhilaration of embracing risk and the rush of living life at the edge of death. I found new real life heroes who dare to live big and who lead and inspire me to take steps to create the physical life I want to live. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vaGCdymhA40 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Li60JL0Cpuc.

I was reminded that I am capable of being anything I want and that I can paint my life as I want it to be. I am not limited to staying where I am. I am a badass and I am destined for a life of adventure and joy.

Life can be colorful. I can fly. I can be free. I can, and should, live "full wingspan". https://vimeo.com/127831614.

My muse also reminds me every day that life is fragile and beautiful and painful and complicated and that we all need to feel connected. Everything can change in an instant. I have learned having my own high flying momentum can help me stay positive and moving in the direction I want to go. I learned I should always carry my own key to my own happiness. I have learned that when we are really wanting something, while at the same time fearing it isn't possible, we are trapped by two competing forces that lock us into stagnation and keep us from the life we want and deserve to have. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xANjrN3rVvE.

There is so much to learn and so little time to experience it all. I desire freedom to share ideas and I desire the opportunity to influence the world for GOOD.

I have absolute gratitude and unconditional love for my muse. Forever. My life and momentum are unquestionably changed by the influence and love of my muse and by them being exactly who they are.  I am so grateful for the ideas we shared and created together in summer 2020.  There are many, many more ideas and insights that were shared with me by my muse. I will share more of them as I go along in this project of discovery and growth and Things I Learned.

Thank you, Miel. Your friendship meant more than you will ever know. Be well. Be happy.

My muse reminded me we all need to love each other and lift each other up.  Those of us who can, SHOULD share our sunshine, ideas and gifts everywhere we go.

NATIONAL SUICIDE PREVENTION LIFELINE. Available 24 hours. Languages: English, Spanish. 800-273-8255

DIAL- A-POEM 1-641-793-8122 https://www.sfmoma.org/read/john-giornos-dial-a-poem-still-brings-poetry-to-the-masses/